My therapist said I should journal

Anyone remember xanga? The pre-myspace journal website that I now believe ironically has been replaced by WordPress. Although if you google it – it’s “Xanga 2.0….” I suspect that’s been “coming,” for a while.

To be honest, I have no idea how to use this website. But, I have tried countless times to keep a journal and countless times I have failed – thus in flows the guilt.

You know when you’re supposed to do something, but somehow the two seconds it takes to take out that piece of paper or open the journaling app you’ve been paying $50.00 a year for (for three years) feels impossible. Like there’s a tiny magnet in your fingers pulling you away from the medium your brain tells you to open and somehow always making its way to instagram, facebook or (don’t shame me), amazon.

In this day and age it is actually a risky concept to start a blog. Our freedom of speech is in peril. People are getting their global entry revoked or job offers rescinded, positions terminated for things they have or had posted on the internet.

But inside me there remains this deep pull. A pull to share what I have experienced and captured with the world. Not in a perfect manner. Trust me, this blog is nothing about perfection.

If I have to focus on being perfectly witty or grammatically correct or heck even factually correct (I called the brain a muscle the other day in front of someone who promptly corrected me) cueing a quite abysmal lobster-like blush that crept slowly up my face into my ears, searing the memory into my muscle-ley brain.

No, the goal is not perfection. Or even that anyone will read this. If I’m being self-aware it’s really about the desire to share my life with those who want to hear about it.

Unlike instagram, you are not forced to click this link. You do not have to see footage of my cat’s tenth birthday party or my copious ventures to Disney or the pastry I bought for breakfast that day. And subsequently, I do not have to feel pressured to post such things – to pull myself away from the moment, documenting it so I don’t “miss it.” A bit contradictory isn’t it?

Fact of the matter is, I forget most everything – and in this short book we call life, I want to document the chapters.

So this blog is my attempt at that. It is an open book for those who want to take it off the shelves and a non-existing portal for those who (and I respect this) don’t care. It’s a way for me to share my passion about food, getting lost down random alley-ways before my partner steers me in the right direction, and of course, photographing cats.

We leave for Japan on Friday. If all goes well, people can read about that journey here. For once, I feel committed to making this work. Cheer me on internet universe. I’ve got this.